Thursday, October 21, 2010

Tea Party Sugared with Forgiveness

It seems to always be cloudy outside on my Tea Parties.  And today is no exception.  Which is why this Tea Party is starting a little late.  But non-the-less, I'm having one, and I would love for you to join.

For this tea party, I would be sprucing things up drinking Chai Tea.  I would be wearing my long salmon colored dress and my white cardigan because I think fall should equal skirts.

I would tell you about how this week has just been a bit of a mess with a house full of sickies and a constant reappearance of diaper rash.  I would tell you how the hubby and I are starting to regret baby sleeping in bed with us {but I probably would still do it all over again}.  I would tell you that I'm sore.

I'm sore because I started Insanity, the no equipment version of P90X.  I would tell you that I managed to work my way hard through the first physical test and that I was the only one in my family, including the hubby and brother, that finished the physical test.  I would brag and brag about that to you.

I would tell you that eating 5 meals of 370 calories is actually turning out better than the three big meals I was eating before.  I would tell you that discovering new ways to eat healthy and yummy is actually not as bad as I thought, then I would suggest you give Insanity a try!

I would then probably get a little deeper.  I would tell you that I'm struggling with forgiving some family members who have decided on an opinion of who I am.  I would tell you how much it hurts to find out that family members so easily talk behind my back and then pretend to like me to my face.  I would tell you how I just don't feel like I can keep up with what they want from me because it just isn't who I am.  I would tell you that I need to forgive them for blaming me.  But I love them, and the forgiveness is necessary for our relationship to move forward.

It isn't easy.  I can barely forgive myself for things I've done.  Its harder for me to forgive them because I can always reason in my head and justify my emotions.  Or I'll feel like I'm getting there, and then something new will come up to tear me down again.

I would probably feel encouraged because I'm sure each of you know exactly what I am talking about!  And then we would probably giggle sharing stories or say with a big sigh and a bit of excitement "Yes, I know exactly what you mean 'cause that happened to me".

But then I would say that my lack of forgiveness isn't hurting them.  Its hurting me.  I would probably pause and let it soak in.  I can only be held accountable for how I react.  I can only be responsible for MY heart.  I would finish by saying that I haven't gotten there yet.  I would even say that just thinking about these people now still bring up anger and the temptation to rag on them, but I wont.  I can't.  Because it wont make them look bad, it will only speak of my character.  So I'll refrain.

We'll probably give hugs, chat a bit about how this blog world is ridiculously addicting and how its driving our husbands insane, but we'll throw our hands up in surrender and say "Oh well, they'll get over it" and probably giggle some more.

What is something you have to forgive someone for?  What would you tell me if we were really having this Tea Party face to face?  I would so love to know.  Link up and sip with me!


1. Write a post about what Tea Flavor you'd be drinking and what kind of Tea Delights you'd be eating...
2. Let us know what kind of things you'd talk about.
3. Grab a Button and Link Up!  Be Sure to Have Fun.



  1. I'll send it back to you, girl.
    WHEW- heavy. As you already know, our in-law issues are pretty similar... & it's hard. But you're right, it's only hurting me for not facing it & showering them in forgiveness. You opened my eyes in your post, and I thank you for that.

    If, at any time, you need to talk... you have my number. I'm a text or a call away... & I have an ear to listen.

  2. *hugs to you*
    It's so hard when it's a family member you need to forgive, because the hurt goes so much deeper. I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling with this. You know from my 'day 5' post I am going through this too. We can help and encourage each other!
    You inspire me so much with your words!!
    Oh! and I totally admire you for your vigorous workouts! I am being so lazy these days. I kinda miss being sore. Ha ha.

  3. I'd tell you so much if we could sit down and chat over tea (chai tea is awesome btw). I'd tell you how hard things are with my in-laws, how I don't understand their varying standards for their children. We could talk for a long time about forgiveness! This entry showed me that my non-forgiveness is hurting no one but me...ouch, but oh so true!

    I'm loving these Tea Party entries :)

  4. I love your tea parties! Such a great idea. One of these times I will have to join you. Your openness during them is encouraging.

    Hopefully everyone is on the mend, good for you for meeting your health goals, and I'm sorry you're struggling with your family :( not a fun place to be...I've SO been there and I pray you peace through it.

    And the blogging world? TOTALLY addicting.

  5. Same as laws problems, parents issues...well,now is the time to deal with all!!
    And the true shell set this mama free! LoL
    Thank you very,very,very much for the reminder !
    I adore your pink blog with its pink sweetness and enchanting chats over the aroma of mint tea...ahhhhh
    good meeting you,will be visiting often for tea.

  6. i had to laugh at your comment about annoying the husbands with the blog addiction. sam is pretty supportive, but they just don't get it huh? i feel silly sometimes telling him about "my friend who did this or that" and he's like, "real life friend or blog friend?" they don't get it... blog friends are real friends too!!

  7. First of all, WAY TO GO with the P90X! I made it through 4 weeks of the classic before I got sick and haven't gotten back to it yet. I think I'll try the lean version next. As soon as we are all healthy again, or at least as soon as I am. If I wait for all the kids I'll never get back!
    So sorry to hear about your family problems. Your post brought tears to my eyes. When I need to forgive someone it always helps me to pray for them and to ask God to show me His heart for them. When you are praying for someone you somehow can't help but route for them and when you are routing for someone, well, it's hard to hold a grudge. The other thing I do is try to remember that they are also people, with feelings that have probably been hurt just as much as mine, even if I'm not the one who hurt them (although I probably was). When people treat us like we are "less than" it is usually a reflection of how they feel about themselves. You can do it, forgive them and love them. Help God love them to life! Since they are family, you are in it with them for the long haul, so you have time but make the most of it. Start praying for them today if you aren't already. If lines of communication are open then ask them if there is something specific they need prayer for then really go to God on their behalf. Do remember, God created you as an individual. It's not your job to try and please them, just Him. If they aren't happy with you, that's okay. Just remember Micah 6:8 "And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." You can't control how they view you, but like you said, un-forgiveness doesn't hurt anyone but you. Plus, forgiving them doesn't mean that you are saying what they did is okay, it just means you aren't going to take it into account. Read I Cor. 13 " doesn't take into account a wrong suffered..." Ask the Lord to help you love them and you'll be fine.
    Okay, so I guess that's enough for my NOVEL! I get a little carried away. I hope you like reading at your tea-parties! By the way, it was lovely, I'm glad I came.

  8. Dang, thanks soo much for the compliment on my pics....that means a LOT coming from you!!! We live in Steamboat Springs CO. It's gorgeous here, don't get me wrong, but we have 6 months of winter. I guess that gives me plenty of time to figure out White Balance eh? hahahahaha. Thanks for the tea party. Your candidness is refreshing! I will try and join this week. I ALWAYS have SOMETHING to talk about! :)