Tuesday, March 3, 2009

A Prayer for the Ephesians

Often times I find myself asking my husband if he loves me. Most of the time he quickly answers with a "yes babe, of course I do." But there are times when he'll get frustrated and ask how I could ever doubt and what could he possibly have done to cause me to question his love. And when I think about why I asked him in the first place, I can respond with "because I just don't feel it."

You must know a little bit about my husband to understand why I'm going on this point. My husband sacrifices every moment of his life to express his love towards me. And for those of you who know Jon and know me, can honestly question how I can ever question Jon's love towards me. Even deep down I know that Jon loves me deeply, but sometimes I just don't "feel" it.

So often, we are caught up in how we feel and base reality off of how were feeling about things at the present moment. We know how dangerous this can be, especially as women. Our emotions change like this recent California weather; sunny and eighty degrees on Sunday, cold and rainy on Monday. There's so many factors that effect how we feel. I can feel like doing absolutely nothing just 'cause its cloudy and dark outside or the change in hormones can make me feel gloomy on a bright and sunny day. We obviously know in our minds that our feelings cant always be trusted. But yet, more often than not, I find myself asking God if he still loves me because I don't feel it.

Paul's prayer for the Ephesians in chapter three of the book of Ephesians addresses this very thought:
"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power,
together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is
the love of Christ..."

But Paul did not just stop there...
"...and to know this love that surpasses all knowledge-- that you may be
filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."

Its a constant struggle to match what we know in our minds to how we feel in our hearts. I know in my mind that there is "nothing that can separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord" (Romans 8:38-39), but sometimes in my heart I don't feel it. Yet, Paul writes in Ephesians 3:17-19 that God's love is so deep, high, long, and wide for us that we cant even fully fathom it, but that he prays that we will have the power to grasp just how full God's love is for us. And so, like the Ephesians, I claim that prayer in my own heart to "be filled to the measure of the fullness of God."

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