Friday, December 31, 2010

The Greatest Mistake of My Life

Today has nothing too exciting in store for me.  And I'm ok with that.  This time last year my heart was in turmoil.  And I'm about to go back and address it.


You might have heard a mention or two about the events that took place last year that caused my world to go spinning.  Or so it seemed to me.  But its been a year since I made the greatest mistake of my life.  I let fear win.


Their faces are so vivid in my memory and I dread the day when they're gone.  Most times I try to repress it because the pain is still so real.  I'll admit, with each day, the pain pierced a little less, but some days, days when I would least expect, the pain hurt beyond my control and I would just weep.


I had grown to love seven beautiful hearts that belonged to seven handsome boys.  Jon and I were given the job to provide a loving, family oriented home to children who's parents couldn't or wouldn't take care of them.  It seemed like our dream job.  We were paid to be full time stay at home parents.  And it was perfect.  But time allowed my enemy to creep in and instill a tiny seed of fear that would grow and one day sprout its ugly head.  


We weren't perfect at our job.  And I could list many regrets (yes, I will openly and honestly say that I have regrets).  But I LOVE those boys.  And after the birth of my daughter, all I wanted to do was go back home and be with them, as one BIG LOVING FAMILY.  But it was then FEAR took over and I couldn't handle it.


I believe I had post-partum blues.  I'm sure many can relate.  Not quiet diagnosed as depression, but a temporary state when sorrow takes over and nothing to little can console it.  I burried my daughter and myself deep into our room wanting no one near.  I watched episodes of 19 Kids and Counting to distract myself from the little whispers of fear I was hearing.  I would just sit, rock my newborn baby, and cry.  And honestly, I grew angry at every little voice I heard from the boys in my home.  I wanted them gone.


I begged and pleaded for Jon to take me away.  To rescue me.  I was desperate for help.  But I got nothing.  So, what he thought was best, Jon listened to my cries and drove me and our new bundle the 20+ hours to California, leaving behind 7 very confused and broken hearted souls.  We had just a few minutes to say goodbyes and they were stripped from our lives and our ability to communicate seems held on by only the prayers of my heart.  


And on that long drive back, it hit me.  I MADE A MISTAKE!  I had let the whispers of FEAR grow loud enough that the Voice of TRUTH couldn't be heard.  And so marked the first day of 2010.  It was downhill from there.  The pain in my heart only fueled the GUILT that I would feel.  And that guilt would be my greatest obstacle this past year!  


And that obstacle still stands before me as I welcome the day that rings in 2011.  A fresh year with many memories of my past running as fast as they can to cross over with me.  


Some memories are lovely.  Like the day we all went out driving through the city trying to find a park with a lake.  And after 4 hours of driving around a city 20 minutes wide, we found it only to be too tired to enjoy it.  But the laughter, songs, and terrible belting noises coming out of our 17 year old, made it one of the greatest days of my life.  


And some memories, not so much lovely.  But I've trucked on.  And the consequences for my choice will leave a few battle scars.  Scars that will show great pain with Beautiful Healing.  


And although I can stand before you and say "Hello, My name is Jhen and I've abandoned a child (or seven)..."  I can finish it with "... but I've been forgiven."  


I may never know if the boys will ever forgive me.  Some may, some wont.  And I have to learn to be ok with that.  And I have fought this year with the greatest fight in me yet.  I have been beaten, bruised, and torn down by the words spoken about me and the whispers spoken to me, but I am not dead.  And in that, I can see that the strength in me is not that of my own.  I gave up.  I thew in the towel, laid flat on my face before the enemy and said "You're right, I'm guilty.  I did a bad thing."  But someone took a step and stood between me as I laid battered and torn and spared my life.  And as the enemy retreated, I was held.  And I wept.  And I continue to weep.  But in my tears I can see joy.  I can see the beauty starting to shine through and each day, I'm finding Love and Grace.  


And I can tell you that the Greatest Mistake of My Life is being transformed into beautiful new choices of good.  I can't take back what I did.  I can't fix it.  But I can, instead, move forward and allow My God to take a mistake and make it into something Beautiful!  


So friends, as you've joined me on this crazy adventure this past year, I invite you to travel a little further with me.  Because, in all of our mistakes, Good Can Come.  And each of you are just a little good that has entered my life and I'm grateful for it!  You have entered my family and my heart!  


So, to 2011, you can only go UP from here! 



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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Top Ten of Twenty Ten

Amber from Amber's Article's came up with the idea and asked a few of us bloggy mommies to host it, but it's OPEN TO YOU!!!  So sort through your archives of 2010 and select your Top 10 of 2010 of your kiddo or animal (photo must be taken by YOU).  


To see other HOST'S posts, visit these sites or click on the links below!


This was hard considering I have a lot of pictures of Joss to go through!  But it was fun!  So here are my favorites (not necessarily best quality) but my all time favorite photos of my Cupcake Muffin!


1. Nothing special, but EVERYTHING special.  We had just moved back to California and we were going somewhere (don't know where) to eat... and she looked like a perfect little porcelain doll.


2.  She is just too pretty for her own good!




3.  I started playing around with my camera and picnik.com.  Although my edit is something to CRINGE about, I still LOVE this photo!!!  






4.  This is a picture of Jossie with her Grandpa Stark... and all I have to say is HILARIOUS!


5.  MY FAVORITE ONE with her and her daddy!


6. Again... too pretty for her own good!


7.  This was one of my FIRST edits in Photoshop CS.  It's simple but perfect (to me).  And this  smile will always melt my heart!  This is my ALL TIME FAVORITE PHOTO!


8.  My favorite picture of Joss and Me!


9. When taking a photo class, I snapped this candid moment while we were out in Oak Glen, CA for Apple Picking Season!


10.  The oldest photo of her that I LOVE!  She looks like such a big girl but such a baby at the same time!  


Check out the links below and if you're a fellow mommy to a child or pet, POST along and LINK up!!!  Link closes on Sunday!  Can't wait to see what you have!



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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

I've Changed (and for the better!)

Yes, things are changing.  It's less than a month away from when I hit the big TWO FIVE, and I think my blog should grow up with me!  So I made a few changes and I loved learning all about HTML and blogger as I went along.  There will be a few minor touch ups here and there but this will be the BIG NEW BLOG!

I'm excited to get back into the swing of blogging.  I've prepped a few things here and there... especially for this upcoming year!  And changes are happening within our little family too, but I can't tell you that yet [wink]!

But my little munchkin is sick with double ear infections and the flu {not to mention the shots she received for her 1 year check up}.  So after most of the day fiddling with the new design, I must resign back to my "mommy duty"!

Hope you like what you see!

And I have a new button!



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Tuesday, December 28, 2010

REVAMP

In the next couple of days you will see odd changes to this blog.  And thanks to my lack of knowledge in HTML, some days it may look WAY OUT OF WACK!  So pardon the mess, but this place is about to get revamped!  


Oh... and side note; Jenny.Ann Photography is NO MORE!  It's Stark Love Photography now!  CHECK IT OUT!  



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Thursday, December 23, 2010

What Happens...

What happens when you're left alone to care for your younger siblings with no food to eat for days?


What happens, when as a newborn baby, your mother was too overtaken by drugs you've cried so much for so long that you've permanently destroyed your vocal chords?


What happens when your father has tied up your mother and forces 6 year old you and all of your siblings to torture her?


{Have I made you so disturbed you've stopped reading?}


What happens next?


What happens when people answer the call to dedicate their lives and families to loving the "least of these"?  


What happens?


What happens if you've been asked to be that person?


What happens if you've been given the choice to live comfortably or live radically?


What happens next?


That's an answer saved for another day, but these are all questions we've been asked these past few days spent in Arizona.  


During our stay we met some amazing people doing radical things.  We met a couple, who after having already raised two of their own, felt the need to help out as many children as they could.  And after only five months as house/foster parents, they have hugged, loved and safely cared for over 30 children and the number continues to rise!  We met a young family that made the commitment to love unconditionally children who've been abused and abandoned.  And we met many others who've dedicated themselves and their families to loving the unloved children.  


We've been inspired.  We've been moved to tears.  We've been on our knees in surrender to the One who's Heart created these little ones to Live and Thrive.  We've been called to love the "least of these".  


And although we don't have an answer yet, we know that we were made to do something about the lack of love in this world... and we're getting ready...


So for our stay, we remained silent, laughing and playing when the time was right.  But mostly learning and observing as much as we could.  But one day we got out for a little exploring but only as far as the Cactus would let us.


























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Saturday, December 18, 2010

A Heavy One

My back is aching and I am realizing I'm getting old.  25 years old to be exact {notice the getting because the big 25 milestone is just around the corner}, but anyway,  I feel like I'm falling apart and my energy is low... but I guess that comes along with the territory of trying to build a photography business and revamping it in the peak of the season as well as chase around a now One Year old!  And all of the "to-dos" of the Holidays are catching up since I have yet to do them.


But just wait, I'm not complaining (ok, maybe about the back), but I'm more listing and there's quite a bit of excitement in my skip.  'Cause there is so much in store!  


Before I get there, I must go here!  Check out these amazing personalized note cards I won from Pear Tree Greetings by a Giveaway over at The Paper Mama's (who's little one just turned One today!)  




I love these little cards and I want to use them so badly, but I have to save them for special little notes.


Now, my first year is completed with a big fat check mark on the side.  I did it.  I survived the year that forever changed me and the entire way I viewed the world.  My little girl managed to still love me unconditionally despite all my mistakes, failures and attempts at figuring out all things mommyness.  And with that I can give myself a good pat on the back.  


It is officially a year since the first day of the rest of my life.  Yes, because that is when all things changed and I grew up a little (sadly it came a long with lots of questionable choices, overflowing tears and a whole lot of heartbreak).  But here we are today.  One little family.  


And because I know you all want to see Birthday photos.... here's just a few [ha!].   We didn't have a birthday party for her, more like birthday dinners.  We dined at the in-laws, Grandma & Grandpa Stark's house on her actual birthday, and the we had my childhood friend and her entire family over for a simple but fun dinner just the other night.  


























{A Glimpse at my future...}




I Just Loved Her Reaction to her Gift!


Yes, we must laugh at the preciousness of this photo!







Our beloved and most anticipated trip to Disneyland for her birthday was postponed!  So I guess that means her birthday celebration isn't over- wahoo!


And we're off, our little family of three, to Tuscon, Arizona for four days to check out a possible job opportunity.  I'll let you know how that goes another time.   



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Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Can You Believe It....


I'm off to celebrate the life that entered my world and flipped it a good one {Most of you may know the story, if not, read it here}.  


A year ago tonight, I could not have even fathomed I would be sitting at my desk blogging thousands of miles away from where I was then.  


But my world is made up of choices I have made and the Grace my God has given.  


I'm thankful for the chunky monkey that spins and twists in bed to cuddle in just the right spot against my side. 


I'm thankful for the crooked smile she's managed to inherit from me.


I'm thankful for all the lack of sleep and the moments of staring at her face as she grew before my eyes. 


I'm thankful for my little one and the next few days I get to spend Celebrating her precious life {Disneyland Here We Come!}




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Christmas With the Blog Babies... the great exchange!


[Left to Right Top}
[Left to Right Bottom}


I've gotten to know some pretty amazing people in this blog world.  And some of us got together, with the creative idea from Shawntae, to do a bloggy gift exchange!  Joss and I were thrilled to be a part of it!


After all the names were drawn, I had to put on my creative hat and find Kingston the perfect gift {to see what little Josselyn got her handsome Kingston, visit A Little King and I}.


And little Henry, from It's a Wonderful Life, drew little Jossie's name and boy were we lucky!  The night of her little gifts arrival we opened it right away, and here is her delight.







I had waited for just the right moment to snap pictures of Joss in her new dress.  But it was thrown off by a bloody gum as she fell face first into a chair... but we have pictures none the less.  







I love the dress and hair clip Henry got Joss!  He must really know his fashion sense to pick out such a pretty dress (mama might have helped a bit ;)  


Thank you Henry and Mama Allie for such a beautiful dress and hair clip!  We love it!


To see other gift exchanges, click the links!