"Cathedrals have tried in vain, to show the image of your face. But we are, by your design, signature of divine. We'll always sing your praise. We'll always sing your name." -Needtobreathe
I have this thing where I care a little too much about what people think or believe about me. It's fueled a lot of what I have or haven't posted here. And maybe some of that is ok, because there is a lot I'm learning to treasure in the moment and not share for all to get involved in, but then there comes this deep realization that I've let so much of what I want other's to think of me pave the path for a lot of my choices.
I would really love to see my name plastered big somewhere to draw people in. Really. I would. I always dreamed of being some great well known public speaker, and the thought of being the one people line up to take a picture with sounds freakin' awesome.
But I would also love to hear "well done, my good and faithful servant."
Good and faithful.
Words that tend to fall to the wayside when I'm out pursuing a greater name for myself- or more likes on a photo, or the number rise on my followers. I get so easily caught up in trying to figure out the system, the game, the strategy to playing myself that makes my story look greater, because I really do believe that my story is worth being told, but I get trapped in trying to sell it.
Let's just break it down and remove the fluff.........
I thought I needed social media to communicate and grow the "brand" that is me, my testimony, my worth, and my signature. Like, if I just had enough IG followers, I'd become something. If I could style or stage my visuals that would make people want to be more like me, or want a piece of what I have to offer, then maybe I'll become just worthy of what I want to become.
It sounds ridiculous.
But its true. So painfully and honestly true.
Yet I've come to realize, my worth isn't in social media. My worth is not in a void designed by distance, filers, and creative captions. My worth is fully founded in the fact that the God of this UNIVERSE died on the cross, carrying everything I have ever done wrong and will ever do, to his death, and then conquered it all in forgiveness through coming BACK TO LIFE. That is my worth. The worth of eternally being called "HIS". It is enough, and I'm striving to believe it wholly.
My blog, my photos, and my story may never make it out to the masses. Or it may. I honestly don't know. But I'm choosing to live good and faithful to Christ, who is good and faithful to make all things work together for good, and trust that what He has in store for me is far greater than what I could ever try to muster up on my own.
So it's time I take a break. An undetermined amount of time away from Facebook & IG.
Our family's adventures and my random thought process can be found here on my blog, so if you want to follow along, first and foremost invite me to tea and coffee and lets start there! Then, subscribe to the blog for posts and updates to stay in the know.